in her shoes

I may not know him enough
but I can't get him out of my head
far too long my heart's in bluff
time to put it to end instead

I may be hoping for a beginning
but what I truly need is a conclusion
so let's arrange this meeting

one without any obligations

..............................................................................................
(A.A: seeking a conclusion, even if it is the last)

I wondered if it was the power of love...
but you can't love a person without knowing and accepting his flaws...

"She does not love him. She loves the idea of being in love with him", N.K offered.

And I love the idea of them meeting up finally.
I can't deny that. I can't stand her waiting any longer.
To be thinking of someone for so long, unable to get past him and yet not being able to do anything about it...
She doesn't even know the guy well, they're not even in touch, for goodness sakes.
And she isn't even sure if he's attached...

I guess to have her thinking of him for so long... he must be a real special guy.
N.K said, "yes. but he's all the more special because she got to paint him in the colours of her mind. Nothing could make it that ugly. so it gets to a point where she has to recycle that image in the absence of a real person. Like when you read a book. isn't it always more fascinating than the movie that might come of it?"

"You were hurrying it... even meeting him, and having a positive outcome, is about letting go. Your advice was not bad. it's what any friend would say, really."

Feeling guilty and worried is absolutely NOT how I wanted to end the year...
Then why am I so worried?
I guess maybe it's cos I realised...
I feared too much that she would silent her heart that I had solely put myself in her shoes...

but then...
I totally forgot to put myself in his.

I'm trying to believe that if I were him I would just meet her.
But then again... humans need reasons for everything.

Don't they?